Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Gloomy Day

What a gloomy day today has been -- rain and cold. I had my first PT appointment since the surgery and left feeling rather depressed.

I'm just tired of feeling limited and so darned tired. Then having them tell me I'm doing too much. Only lift a pound or two (I didn't tell them I'd been doing more than that for more than a few days -- not lifting, really, balancing things.) Not being able to drive and having to rely on others... it just makes me feel bad. Not sorry for myself. Just bad.

So I cry. It seems like I cry all the time -- it takes absolutely zero to set me off.

The thing is, I'm uncomfortable, I'm limited. I'm not in pain. I have so very much for which to be grateful. Go figure.

Meanwhile, I do have that purr therapy I speak of so often!

So, tomorrow is supposed to be nicer, and maybe I'll be nicer, too!

I do have a "list."

Call gutter cleaner. (Check.)
Give Rick car that's leaking oil to take in for service. (Check.)
Pick up passport renewal paperwork. (Check.)
Do taxes. (Not yet.)
Sew button on felted bag. (Check)
Finish knitting matching handwarmers and scarf. (Check.)
Finish other pair of handwarmers. (Check.)
Take winter clothes downstairs. (Not yet; postponed)
Make chocolate chip cookies for friends who help me out (this weekend)

My boss gave me several assignments to add to the work-at-home list, and that's good, so I can work off the sick hours and not have to go into vacation time.

Thanks for bearing with my moaning. Cheery Jeanie will be back soon!


beth said...

we should do shoulder whine and wine together and then we'd both feel better !!!

if some time passes and the tears still come easily, would you try acupuncture ?

I swear by that you know !!!

jet1960 said...

Take it easy on yourself.
Don't try to do too much. Repeat after me, "it is OK to rest and recover." Some of what you are feeling may be left over from anesthesia and just the trauma of surgery.

Wish I was closer. Just imagine a good hug!

anno said...

It must be hard to feel so confined. Maybe all this rain will pass and you'll be able to go out for a walk. I've seen some crocus in bloom; the daffodils can't be far behind.

A gentle hug from me, too. I like that wine and whine concept, as well.

Joanne Huffman said...

darn, darn,
triple darn, heck!
It's Ok to cry
when your shoulder is a wreck!


Herzblatt said...

Oh my poor Jeanie...
I can feel with you because I know what you experience at the moment...I had similar problems many years ago with the difference, that I had terrible pain.....I remember, when I thought everything was okay with my shoulder although I still had some pain, we started by night train to Vienna for a concert with the three tenors: Plácido Domingo, Luciano Pavarotti und José Carreras. We had bought the tickets long before I got my shoulder problems. Lying at night in the small train bed was terrible but it got much worse after the concert, which was in the Prater stadion, because applauding was not a good idea...but I did, because I was so enthusiastic....with the result, that we went home during day by train, (it was a very hot summer day),every time when the man with the cold drinks came along, I bought some cold cokes,not to drink but to press them against my painful shoulder.
It was too early to go to Vienna but the tickets were so expensive that I couldn`t stay at home and I was dying to listen to them and to see them there.
So...please don`t do the same mistake than I did...

BONNIE K said...

I think we take our independence for granted and when it's gone, it's a shock to the system. Hang in there. It will get better! By the way, we loved your handwriting on the note you sent.

Bree said...

Everyone's allowed to be down and uncheery occasionally. That means you too. Just relax and enjoy your downtime.

Beth said...

Oh Jeanie, I sure can relate to your post. I remember when I broke my ankle 9 years ago and had major hardware placed in it. It got so fustrating depending on others and not being able to do what I want to do. Crutches and I were not a good team and I couldn't but any weight on it for 6 weeks. Very miserable.
But you must not push yourself, I did what I was told and I have nevre had any problem with my ankle. You just keep getting some Purr comfort and give your self time to heal. I wish I was closer and could come visit and help out.
Thinking about you!

Judy Winter said...

I agree with Bree 100 percent! Everyone I talked to yesterday was having a bad day. You're entitled, too. It's all part of being human. Extra hugs to you! xoj

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