Dreaming of Paris: Valentine's Day and Love

Paris. It may be the City of Light but I daresay more than a few of us would call it the City of Love. As part of Paulita's "Dreaming of Paris," I am remembering our last day in Paris two years ago.

I know there are those who find the practice of hanging a lock on a bridge, then tossing the key into the underlying river, either strange (at best) or at worst, a threat to the water environment (all that dredging -- oh, how I'd love to have some of those rusty keys for my art!). And there is potential damage to the bridge. (Which is one reason by every so often, the locks are removed and the process begins again.) USA Today outlined the challenges in this article.

But for Rick and me, it was a wonderful thing to do on this last day in the City of Love, where holding hands and public displays of affection are commonplace.

It was a gloomy day -- gloomy on many accounts. It was gray. Gray everywhere -- the buildings, the water, the sky. And it was pretty nippy. And raining. And we were also a bit gloomy because we were leaving the next day. Yes, continuing our vacation (fun) but leaving Paris (sad).

So, there on the Pont des Arts, we left a little of ourselves in Paris. With a thick Sharpie, we wrote our initials on our padlock.

Then we tied on a bright blue ribbon -- the blue we weren't seeing in the sky, just our hearts.

We attached it to the bridge and holding hands, tossed the key into the Seine. (I have done far more environmentally worse things than this, I fear.)

I've thought of that lock often since that day. We've been through a lot of sad, a lot of challenges. We have dealt with our share of illness for not only each of us but for others we love. And we are stronger than ever. And I've thought of Paris -- almost every day, because when you have been to Paris, you can't let it go.

I expected our lock to be swept up by the Parisian police during a bridge purging and the key to be dredged up. I wasn't sure when, but the odds are there.

But last July, my friend Jerry sent me this photo.

And in September, this one.

The lock is still there. The ribbon faded, to be sure. But holding tight, just like Rick and me. I am quite sure we shall outlive the lock. But even when it is gone, it will remain there in my heart.

Getting Creative: Valentines

I don't know why I haven't zipped out more art lately. But I got on a roll around Valentine's Day.

It was all red and pink and lots of hearts! I used my gelli papers and some painted with acrylics for all of the larger cards.

For the smaller ones, gelli or handpainted hearts and washi tape.

And I have to say, I was "loving" every minute of it!

Out and About in February

I've been hunkering down a lot this month -- too much snow and cold (and it just doesn't stop). I'll look out the window and it may be large puffy flakes; wee, idly falling flakes or rapidly descending snow -- pure and simple, snow. The one thing that is constant is that it doesn't seem to stop. But that hasn't stopped me for getting ready for Valentine's Day.

Or getting about when need be. The other day I took my turn on our university theatre friends board delivering cookies to the actors and tech crew during their first tech rehearsal of "Cyrano." (Isn't that a good show for Valentine's Day?)

I spent a lot of my life in this building as a student; it's nice to give back. But I'll tell you -- I don't think anyone was arriving by bike!

Even Rick has been off the bike this winter. Instead, he is turning his attention to bread-baking.

He took a class at the renowned Zingerman's Bake House in Ann Arbor a couple of weeks ago and learned what he had been doing right and wrong!

I've been taking my turn in the kitchen, too. This is my potpie from the new "Sweetielicious" pie cookbook.

(I've written about this enchanting bakery here which has achieved a national reputation before. Here is Sweet Linda herself, signing my book and others that found their way into Christmas boxes!)

There is a story to this chicken pot pie. The night before was my friend Mike's memorial service. After, a number of us went to one of Mike's favorite restaurants for dinner. I ordered what was billed as the "all you can eat chicken dinner" -- it was a lemon herbed chicken with a side of pasta and a salad. I figured there would be leftovers. I didn't think it would be this much!

Yes, they didn't mention in the menu it was a whole half chicken. After the salad and pasta side, I had about four bites. Needless to say, the leftovers made for a great pot pie! (The leg and thigh are in the go-box and the white meat still on the plate. Bad blogging photo.) Ah, well...and the U.S. doesn't have a problem with portion control?

On another front, I haven't killed my rosemary yet, bringing it inside for the hard winter.

And I'm still trying to kick off icy snow yuck from the car. Almost broke a toe trying. Rick managed, but I know I softened it up for him.

 

I've been busy making valentines, too, and a gift for Rick -- but that's another post. Meanwhile, keep the candles burning and your hearts warm.

The 2013 (yes, 13) Book List

I don't know why I've been having such trouble with this post! I started it in early January and -- well, there you are! I guess I've been too busy "arting" and reading and Christmas and enjoying life to review! That changes now!

In 2013, I read 25 books. Some were frivolous, some marvelous, some "just there." I wanted to share my highlight a few notables I haven't mentioned in previous posts. Those mentioned in earlier posts here or on Chopsticks and Strings include links to the posts.

Travel

When Wanderer's Cease to Roam: A Traveler's Journal of Staying Put (Vivian Swift)

Le Road Trip (Vivian Swift)

These are my two favorites. Hands down. I'll be doing another post about Vivian Swift soon, but if you aren't familiar with her wonderful and enchanting illustrations and delightful text, check out these two books.

"Wanderers" focuses on her year deciding to stay put at her home in a small Long Island town. You follow Vivian through the seasons, her cats, her neighbors and take some side trips back into her memories of other enchanting places. If you are an artist or designer, you will appreciate the book (both of them, actually) for their splendid illustrations and layout. But that's bonus points. Pure and simple, bonus points.

"Le Road Trip" chronicles Vivian's honeymoon in France with magical paintings of various locations, wry observations on love and France and terrific heart. Ask for this one from your Valentine! (Speaking of which, my valentine, Rick, has picked up this book more than once to read through parts. It's terrific.

Vivian's wonderful blog (which includes many painting lessons) is on hold while she finishes her book and comments are closed. But the blog itself is HERE and well worth a look. If you check out THIS POST on how to draw a cat, you might find a familiar face!

Living in a Foreign Language (Michael Tucker)

Rick thought this was sort of a cream puff but I loved "L.A. Law" star Michael Tucker's food memoir of his life in an Italian village in Tuscany (with his wife and "Law" star Jill Eikenberry). This book follows them from their vacation visit to owning their own home with a heavy emphasis on foodie Tucker's love affair with Italian cooking, wine and cuisine. You will want to make pasta every day after reading this (and learn a few tricks of traveling in Italy, too!)

Memoirs

Dearie: A Biography of Julia Child (Bob Spitz)

I don't know how many bios I have read on Julia (and I have another on the stack). This doesn't strike me with quite the authority of Julia's own "My Life in France" but it is far more comprehensive, going from her childhood (actually, the childhood of her parents) to her death. Spitz writes in an engaging way (some parts were laugh out loud funny -- in a good way).

Julia fans -- check this one out.

Bootstrapper: From Broke to Badass on a Northern Michigan Farm  -- Mardi Jo Link

I love memoirs and Bootstrapper is an empowering one. Writer Mardi Jo Link is a Michigan author whose husband left her and the three kids for another. (He still lived in near her farm outside Traverse City). He also left her with debt and a lot of struggle.

This biography covers her struggles to save her farm, feed her kids and keep her dignity. She is funny, feisty, well spoken and filled with love and determination. Highly recommended.

Jacqueline Kennedy Conversations (Arthur Schlessenger, Jr.)

Shortly after the death of President Kennedy, the former first lady sat down with Arthur Schlessenger, for a number of conversations about her husband. She reveals her take on such things as the Cuban Missile Crisis, the Bay of Pigs, various diplomats and leaders of state (including Kruschev and DeGaulle) and both praises and disses a lot of well known folks (not the least of which, and surprising to me, was her secretary Letitia Baldridge.)

The book I have came with CDs of the conversations as well. It's a longer listen if you go the CDs, but it's worth it to listen to at least some to get the tone of the conversation, the intimacy, Jackie's voice. Maybe it would be a good road trip listen for the more cerebral or politically oriented. (Don't look for much on fashion, the kids or the rest of the family. This is mostly Jackie's take on JFK and his presidency.)

 Health and Inspiration

The Last Best Cure (Donna Jackson Nakazawa)

Hands down, the most important book I read all year. This is non-fiction, health oriented. Nakazawa is a writer who had more health problems than I do and most every other sick person I know. She was a mess -- a total mess. She decided to do her own "research" project -- to find a "last best cure" that would help alleviate, cure or at least make manageable her many issues.

She embarked on a one-year mission to explore alternative treatments (without forsaking her medical doctors) -- treatments that would be available in almost any area of the country and while not necessarily inexpensive could be affordable. Think meditation, yoga, massage, accupuncture, counseling, nutrition.

Her method worked for her -- worked well. And it has made some impact on my issues as well, although I've not done all her things. It is well backed up with scientific research studies and she quotes the data which may be a little much for some but I found rather supportive. I didn't agree or experience all her issues and back story but I think it's an important book for anyone dealing with certain chronic issues including fibromyalgia, blood pressure, arthritis and many other diseases.

Help, Thanks, Wow  (Anne Lamott)

First of all, it's Anne Lamott -- so you  know it is well written. This is a small non-fiction volume about prayers -- there are three prayer categories, according to Lamott -- Help (when we or someone we care about are in trouble), Thanks (when we dodge that bullet) and Wow -- for that awesome mystery of life.

Lamott contends (and I agree) that we make those prayers everyday -- even if one doesn't really believe in prayer to God or some higher power. She outlines each -- and she is (as Lamott fans would know) very funny about it at times. You don't have to be of faith to appreciate this book, to take in her words and give them consideration. If you are, you still will like it.

I would strongly recommend this book as a gift to anyone who may be having a challenging time and could use a little support. That's how it came to me and I will be forever grateful.

Mysteries

The "Aimee Leduc Series" (Cara Black)

I love Cara Black's Aimee Leduc series, all set in various areas of Paris. This year's offering was "Murder in the Lanterne Rouge." If you are looking to enjoy this series, start with the first, "Murder in the Marais." The stories are self-contained but the characters develop over time.

The Henning Mankell "Wallander" Books

I love the television mystery series "Wallander." Thanks to a book club friend, I have now read some of the mysteries by Henning Mankell that formed the basis for the series. I went to the beginning ("The Pyramid" -- five novellas from Wallander's early career) to "A Troubled Man," the final Wallander book. They are well written and for those who have seen the series, faithful to the characters presented on television.

The "Maisie Dobbs" Series (Jacqueline Winspear)

Without doubt, my favorite detective series. This years book was "Leaving Everything Most Loved." Maisie is a psychologist/investigator occasionally helping -- or butting heads -- with Scotland Yard. The first book begins post WWI and this particular book has taken Maisie up to the early 1930s. It appears to be a pivotal one for her various characters.

Again, I recommend this series from the beginning to end because of character development but each book is self-contained.

A Gentle Giant

It should be profoundly easy for me to write about my friend, Mike Lewis. And yet, with his sudden and unexpected passing on January 30, I find my heart filled with such grief that it is hard to get down a sentence without thinking of Mike and bursting into tears. And there's a life lesson to Mike's story for all of us at the bottom of this post, whether you knew him or not, so if you didn't know Mike and this post gets a little too long for you, please skip to the bottom.

You see, Mike wasn't just my friend. He was everyone's friend. He was a man of such profound decency and kindness that he touched lives and he touched their hearts, too.

I worked with Mike for my 32 years at WKAR and we became good friends early on, especially during pledge periods. They were all live then and we would be at the studio for hours on end with long periods between the televised breaks. Mike ran camera then. During the breaks, the crew and I went to their room -- 108 -- and watch MTV or just hung out. There would be trips to the bar after pledge -- or our TV Auction, which lasted for 30 years. It was the best time of my working life.

Mike was always there.

Mike was always there. When I was sick last spring, he posted a get well video on my Facebook page -- Mike sending his wishes. It meant a lot. But it wasn't the first time I felt his support. He was there when my dad died. When things were choppy with work. Many years before that, I remember him walking with me and my friend Gina, for hours, after midnight, when my heart was broken and I just needed to be with people who cared.

Mike was a big guy. He told me once long ago that when he was young and walking downtown, people approaching would cross the street. He looked intimidating -- and nothing, absolutely nothing, could be further from the truth. He was the gentle giant with the heart of gold, the wonderful sense of humor, the one who spent time to please and delight you.

He was of generous spirit -- for example, his huge (and I do mean huge) video collection rivaled that of a video store.

He would loan his DVDs for $1 -- unlimited return time. Oh, and if you didn't -- or you really liked it -- he'd say "Oh, keep it. I have lots of others." And trust me -- if you were playing Trivia -- you wanted Mike on your team.

From running camera at WKAR, Mike went into video graphics. It was a new world, a new technology, and he loved it. He also loved photography and making videos and posters.

One of his most popular "gifts" was a birthday poster, often based on a book or movie, where he would put you and those who were part of your world into the picture with you. This was for my birthday...

...so was this...(It's hard to see, but Rick is the Mad Hatter, Gypsy is there and so is my dad, among others, along with my art work and good friends.)

...and this.

He celebrated "In-Between" Day (the day between my birthday and best buddy Gina's) with this:

 

And you might remember this one from my retirement (my favorite)...

...and this one...

...and this one, too.

And there were others. Like this one for Tim, 

the ultimate Cubs fan.

 

...for Andy, the dashing young student (who now works for "Parks and Recreation")...

For Mike, one of our producers at the station. (Mike always, always made me look better than I really was!)

For our friend Marge...

And lots of others, like this one for Jim.

It's a tribute to Mike that after his friends heard of his passing, we started posting the birthday posters he made for us on Facebook and a lot of us changed our profile photos to a poster or detail from one. I was amazed at the body of work he churned out for his friends.

But it wasn't just graphics. It was video and video slide shows, too. I was always "Gidget" to Mike. I don't know why -- I was never as cute as Gidget. But I loved it. So, he made this one for me last year, culling from photos on my blog, Facebook and ones he'd taken I had never seen.

He chronicled our trip to Europe with this 11-minute slide show that is a love letter to France (below some of the images are cut off because of my template, but the link gets you full screen).

He remembered Rick's family reunion with this one to the song "For All We Know, We Will Never Meet Again." I can't tell you how many tears I cried when I listened to this one.

In the 1980s when a lot of us were at odd with the world, at least romantically, we formed a group of seven friends, the SPIES (Single People in Emotional Stress). We four women and three men went to movies together, had progressive dinner parties, celebrated Valentine's Day. We might act as all seven, maybe only two or three. We got each other through a lot of tough times. Here's Mike at the Oscar party...

...and at the Progressive Movie Party. One movie per house!

Mike joined us at Christmas more than once -- sometimes for dinner, sometimes after -- just to hang out and have fun. I still look at those days as some of the best times of my life.

Mike had a lot of medical issues which forced his leaving WKAR a number of years ago. It was a sad time for everyone there and the circumstances were unfortunate. But he hung in there, ramping up his videos and posters. For so many of us, his death was unexpected. We all knew he had health issues; we never thought they would take him away from this world so suddenly.

There is the family in which we are born and the family we choose for ourselves, made up of friends. Mike's friends have been sharing stories on their (and his) Facebook page, along with photos that will be put into a slide show for his memorial. I hope he knows how much he was loved. Because oh, he was loved by so many, so much.

More than a Tribute

This post, though, is more than a tribute. There is a message that's important to share. The morning of the day Mike died -- or maybe the day before -- his last Facebook post read: "Someone call me." The replies ranged from the Facebook jokey to "Call you what?" to posting songs like "Call Me" and "Call Me Maybe." And, I might add that's all suitable FB stuff -- we all post things like that and when we offer out humor on a regular basis, we expect to get it back. Mike had a good sense of humor and knew his friends well -- I doubt he was too surprised at the replies, all in good fun. At least, I hope Mike took it all that way.

I saw that post, too. And I thought "I've got to call Mike. We'll go to Oscar movies in the daytime and I have all those photos I want to give him." I'd only seen him once since retirement and that was at a birthday party where the music was great -- but loud. We shouted at each other, even though we were side by side. It was fun. But not really "seeing" someone. In fact, that night at dinner with two of my former SPIES friends, Gina and Carol, we talked about that.

The next morning I heard from a work friend who took the time to call me (rather than discovering it online) that Mike had passed. I can't call him anymore to go to the movies or anything else.

No one can..

 My "word" of the year is Now. I sure goofed up on that one. I just hope Mike understands. Knowing Mike, I've already been forgiven, even if it will take me awhile to forgive myself.